In which yr correspondent, an unwashed American, makes fun of other people’s holiday celebrations

The ludicrous oddities of Yule-tide have long been fodder for confused American writers. American Christmases are almost entirely sanitized, consumer-friendly versions of C. Dickens’s A Christmas Carol. That’s hardly news; there’s a segment on it in Adam Ruins Everything. In point of fact, most Christians frowned upon Christmas, because it was an obvious, blatant rip-off of pagan traditions involving — this is true — lawlessness, human sacrifice, drunken mob violence, and all the things you…